|3

As the day comes closer I become less and less excited.. I feel like it’s all going to just be a waste of money and time. Yea sure.. I get see all of these incredible DJ’s but I seriously don’t feel like going (I don’t even have outfits ready..) you could say it’s my emotions getting the best of me but… I rather not go than have people talk shit while I am over there. 

People have been on their own trip since graduation and I don’t understand how when I try to do my own thing for once, I immediately get judge by the ones that are suppose to love me no matter what. It’s not tough love. It’s being judgmental. 

That’s why I don’t want to go. Yea I shouldn’t care but I do… A LOT.. 

I don’t know how much more I can take before I decide to disappear for good.

& I will be free <3

honestly, I am trying to please everyone at the same time. and its killing my mood.

I think I’m making the right decision but I really don’t know… I hate being unsure of my emotions…I hate being unsure of anything..

ugh… I just want to sell my ticket and not please anyone… 

philanthropicbullshit:

Even though I really want the tv to watch the LOTR trilogy with steven, I REALLY HATE HEARING IT WHEN I NEED TO READ FOR MY CLASS.

LOL make your decision x))

THAT just totally killed my fucking mood for this weekend.

I HATE that I still care about some people that don’t deserve it.

I better be on some good ass crack tomorrow.

philanthropicbullshit asked: Can you help me out? I want to know who the artist for this song is. The lyrics go like this: Yo luiss you melt my heart like butter I love it when you put that toast in the oven You’re a total man You always shave But on the inside you’re a sweetheart like myCat But I don’t have a cat But that’s ok Cause I love you happy 7 months

hijade su chingada madre…..im gonna sock you dawg.

Don’t read if you don’t want to waste time. (Although this is Tumblr..) I just need to vent…

Honestly, I am so sick and tired of these so called “friends”. Seriously.. soooo much shit has happened since we graduated that I’m the only one left to try to fix everything. Yet, if I let go and not care I’M the bad guy. I’M the one that left and not cared. It’s always MY fault. And me being so fucking caring I actually end up believing these “friends” and apologizing. Then it’s back to me being left alone. I am SICK of having to try to fix everything. 

What put the icing on the cake is how quick people can find new buddies. How quickly they adapted to there new crews and started enjoying things they used to HATE. Amazing.

“Well Brenda” they say “I bet you have found a new group of friends too” 

Umm..NO.(I bet if you ASK you would know) I’m over here trying to keep everyone together like a dumbass. Trying to keep these good memories close and grow many more together.But it obviously not going to happen with just one person. 

Friendship is NOT about “let’s see who is going to give in first”

It isn’t about “who is going to text who first”

And It definitely is NOT about ditching them out of nowhere simply because ”we don’t hang out as often so let me just ditch them.they don’t care about me anymore” 

If I tell you that you’re a good/close/best friend you best believe that I fucking MEAN it. 

I understand if we don’t see each other as much, but that is NO excuse to just throw something away that we both thought was so valuable. Unless you didn’t see it as valuable then you trolled me REALLY good.. and congratulations on that.

This isn’t to any specific person. This is for actually for MULTIPLE people. 

So go ahead. Say that I’ve “changed”. That I’m not “there anymore.”

But before you start with your stupid (and very IGNORANT) comments, give yourself a good look in the mirror and REALLY ask yourself if YOU haven’t changed. Like really LOOK at yourself.

Once you do and you still think you haven’t changed, go ahead and talk shit (like always)